Thursday, December 04, 2003
im glad im less dramatized now, whoever they were have left my dreaming preherps their hibernation came or soemthing
what a vain sentence i could realise what im like in her eyes oh no is that a depressing thought
lets wait until it falls away…… oh yes it is
i’ve got to make it to her
play around with some ideas for sure
i could run away but that would be a different day
my minds on focus one point at a time i like it that way i say for today
// posted by me @ 5:57 pm
this blogs looking far too sane hooray in normality alright!
hooray for today!!
here are some songs that i’ve enjoyed recently
(again)
super furry animals – furryvision
the gentle waves – evensong
grandaddy – am 180
jeff buckley – hallelujah
belle & sebastian – is it wicked not to care
gorkys zygotic mynci – mow the lawn
even my own poetry is becoming sensible-if a bit selfish still
// posted by me @ 5:50 pm
Tuesday, November 18, 2003
Today i enjoyed feeding bread to the birds.
The pepper song – inspired by peppers and onions and under milk wood by dylan thomas
pepper pepper pepper
pepper pepper peppep
this is the pepper song
pepper pepper pepper
my year 7 report said i was going to be great
year 8 participate moer
year 9 standerd good
year 10 dissapointing not trying
year 11 skips class does no work
year 12 dropped out
#don’t steal our sun your just killing fun#
// posted by me @ 5:13 pm
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
tea cup
oldest infantcy
17
broken
windswept
sweepwind
just me
always
never
mind
one
or two
as if
no way
// posted by me @ 6:38 pm
Thursday, October 23, 2003
voltage ^
#_^
ouch
no waiting, excellent!?!!
// posted by me @ 6:15 pm
Friday, October 17, 2003
Theres a constant wonder,
is it really not that much at all,
or is it heavier than gold,
now it’s no problem for you,
and your thankful for your cup of tea,
oh, you hope this can be true,
we better shout together thanks forever,
if the frequency is not out of hearing range,
and you bet they’ll be plenty of change,
some people try to control,
but could you fold a paper boat?
yeah theres doubt in my mind
doubt in my mind
almost nothing else at all for you to find,
i said, i dont want to kill you
and when i hear people cheering the other side
i think what have i done,
to live so long and not realised,
that i was wrong
// posted by me @ 11:45 am
Thursday, October 16, 2003
pillow/lyric accompany thing:
Were the enigmatic panda team.
When theres trust they’ll be treats.
I had a dream where I couldn’t talk I couldn’t sing my song.
In the tree by the brook there’s a songbrid who sings.
Aint no drag, papa’s got a brand new bag.
And sunny days in January.
You put my shine to shame.
It’s simple, hunt and gather rules still apply, but we never turn to greed and deaths a catalyst to life, can you hear me?
not the greatest choice but im lazy and catatonic
// posted by me @ 4:03 pm
just remembered what i meant to post… favourite cheese holy cheese
// posted by me @ 3:25 pm
Gimme birthday blues and unformented whine, climb the tree luck it’s made out of pine.
So wow! wow! wow! On the gramaphone. Jus’ give me a ring when you need a cone.
I shout: There’s no breakfast- when you aint got food, you sing a long while- fix mistakes afterward, but when theres food- sit up more straight, unluck around you see- learn not to hate. Yeahyeah!
So wow! wow! wow! On the spinning thing. Jus’ give me a ring when you need a cone.
// posted by me @ 3:15 pm
Wednesday, October 15, 2003
see it, no evil and no good no thing and no would no this and no that no smiling and no’s flat, you know where no is, forget it?
“it was the most miserable night that ive ever seen, and the rain came down like something obscene, and we cried in our pints for no reason at all, accept our lives were shite and we wanted so much more” did we? i don’t know! smile! read on and smile!!
smile to yourself some more, even if those who don’t like smiling how about i say adoor, please smile to yourself, if your love is hard to give loosen up and you will live, smile to yourself, if you love to smile there love and love is good like mugs mine half empty/half full right now, theres a smile somewhere on the radio, sense a smile, touch a smile, smell a smile, hear a smile, see a sense a smile:)
product of one small missed dose of olanzapine medication for schizophrenia and related illness’:
watching my body eat energy more and more
growing older each cell’s dance- tells me to stand back
still I’m feeling younger and i don’t feel no shame
now i know you know understanding is my game- did i just let it on?
sifting through traffic on my home made radio
touch a metaphor i found so low- tell me you understand
i can’t let on or show to break the perfect spell
possibilities in space amuse for days so long
look at that boy being niave just for me
his winning smile i’ll grit my teeth
first thing in your line of sight this care is so far away
just as long as you can play -we’ll wash the blues away
forgotten prozac hidden pain i did it once i’d do it again now
for loves sake i threat myself- give up all there is again
there is too much, im on no quest for perfect health
just a bridge and something else- something from you now
is this conformation from a mirror or are you reading me
i’ll wash your car and brush your teeth
ever know now no one will, and all the trouble ive gone to
in envy’s green light i awoke a pain so bright it almost spoke for me
so we’ve just made something knew our obsessions in full view
always dark and always new somethings lifted right away
everything else dropped in my way right now
im glad that water tastes like meths on funny days
music sung sweetly out of tune listen in and hear the moon
i’d sing thunder over joy and a lake that may annoy
and i’d cry and thousand times if you would but once tell me the time
when theres nothing else you want and the singings got to stop because there’s happyness…
// posted by me @ 3:25 am
i love autumn
// posted by me @ 2:38 am
Sunday, October 12, 2003
seen six straight lines in pixies strokes some hiphop too, i better buy a visor visit library and read some wisdom quick, i want to help other inbetween my screams for help
// posted by me @ 6:43 pm
i used to think ahhh but mad people don’t know they’re mad until i forgot. are you wise? so i said to the guys look i don’t want to die and i truely care if your toothaches that bad dude just dont worry man i’ll get some ibroprofen for you, one guy no no i’ll go but you come for a j in the car, i sighed and said no can do but i’ll make you some tea
// posted by me @ 6:30 pm
oh, Sometimes, my name is John and I like chocolate + animals, we’re all in a farm though i’ve been told it’s a zoo and rachel j makes me feel a-ok 🙂
// posted by me @ 5:47 pm
Monday, October 06, 2003
Yay, went out last night! me scRReams quiet again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don’t want to worry, why do they make out it’s cool to worry?
Hey, it wasn’t personal. More allegorical etc.
Theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrre on holiday!
Breakfast: bowl of skittles additives help me to be more unable to walk in a straight line
Mug: Galaxy Chocolate
Still after that against all odds.
// posted by me @ 2:13 pm
Im so pathetic lame and all round abysmal. (good for you smiled my friend)
// posted by me @ 2:05 pm
Unrefined this is for me and me only so stop reading and go back to sleep. Ideas from a creative explosion, everyone knows it’s not difficult. I’m not weird nor am I pretending to be weird. Ignorance, praise and judgements I don’t want but put up with but only because I want to share ok. Having said that It’s not mine to share go look.
// posted by me @ 1:58 pm
Their fairytales make me jealous when there is music being played. Music stops. Yeahyeah music go music stop. That chairs gone I long to do a lot (of nothing).
Happy weekend, one bind, one strengthen, one safe. Apriciated condolences. 🙂
Music today:
Foo Fighters – generator (best thing on their best album imho)
Capt Beefheart – Autumn’s Child
Yeah yeah yeah’s – mystery girl
Simian – La breeze
Shonen Knife – I am a cat
Super Furry Animals – Demons
Thomas Newman – Whisper of a thrill
Gorky’s Zygotic Mynci – the girl i’ve always known
Nirvana – Love buzz
Flashback dreams hell no college today. Pure extacy sleep in a whole new formless form, take my ego smash it on the floor hide it far away.
// posted by me @ 1:51 pm
Thursday, October 02, 2003
When theres trust they’ll be treats.. So why? Oh Why? Why?
I wanna be forgotten!!
// posted by me @ 2:12 pm
Saturday, September 27, 2003
Alright dudes, the safest way of talking to yourself. Very Ape. I’m to busy trying not to look niave I’m very ape and I’m very nice. Although I don’t feel it. Stuck on a mountain. I want care. Ship wrecked on 2020 street, yeah it’s quite good fun but I’m just an ickle boy.
😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀 😀
// posted by me @ 8:40 pm
Gollum quarter manifest opposite coin dearest elf, I fear you find those thoughts incriminating. I’m pretty sure you are made of toast.
// posted by me @ 8:25 pm
That aside the genuine worries are, be careful, your ego may start slapped your face, ego isnt body and body isnt ego they want different things. Yeah it’s great when they want the same things but don’t pretend. I’m writing this and also reading this. I’ll be crying some long days in during these floods. I could just boat out and leave. I don’t think so. Shock-A-Shock or no Shock-A-Shock. Simple thoughts don’t equal simple minds :'(
// posted by me @ 8:22 pm
Mok-a-mok-mok
Mmm-mmm feelin good!
You should really tell them to at least a straight face who do you think I am? Duff Man?
Honestly, making it a bit more fun is good, but at least make it realistic. I’ve just got a another thing on my mind now 😛
SHOCK-A-SHOCK-SHOCK!!
not this but still… we are the mtv generation, we feel neither highs or lows
It’ll all work out well I garrentee it, and you do to hehehe
// posted by me @ 8:18 pm
Tuesday, September 16, 2003
Stolen lives and time.. Past the little line. What I want, I do not want. Full of corporate noise.. no rest bite, lack of quality. I want no more me. This and that, divided again. I’ve lost my pen, write, found my honesty. Lost in gravity. Seen and sunk, and smelt like a skunk. Thrown aside my true dislike. Opened up so far that I’m closing again. LA LA LA LA, LALA LA LA. I’ll get back there’s forty two police behind me.
// posted by me @ 9:18 pm
Thursday, September 04, 2003
stress make me take risks write crappy emails I really really really hope i havent fucked up again.
10 minutes out’ve
college, i had gone to spar and bought a bottle of water (
the girl buying matches had really soft looking hair ) and
was long gone out’ve spar and felt (metaphorically) as i
was resting on the peak of a mountain, this mountain could
change shape but right now it was really hot red and firey
and pointed ( i presume it was repressed anger that
inspired me to wirte something down ) for while in this
state i noticed something very special about water, it
tasted of meths in the present moment not then but now the
only place we have power to do anything total nowness, it
tasted metal just today it tasted of meths, my frist day of
college and the water tasted meths, i awoke my mind of
knowledge, i went to sleep to find it wasnt worthwhile,
don’t lose the creative brain was the only knowledge of
use, cos the one who liberated the boy i never rated had
great knowledge he didnt show it he always got his way, his
way was to let things take their course, to keep the
awareness and smile
// posted by me @ 4:26 pm
Saturday, August 30, 2003
Really doesn’t do it justise,
I only an innocent mask of timeless everlasting mystery,
Belonging elsewhere but I’m here.
// posted by me @ 12:17 am
Friday, August 29, 2003
Sprinkle the happiness far and wide!
She asked me too early when I was small and blind,
The end the old and the birth of the new,
That was the connection,
I was a kitten,
Now I’m just smitten,
To regain the old emotions I asked around,
The answers I got were from a small cloud,
He said be nice and call the animals don’t run away,
And she will be back before you can say,
Remember to communicate!!
So she came back changed and attacked,
Nurse Nightingale tell me what I need,
You need no wants but her she said,
Now I’ve got ill patients in bed,
To cure the patients I helped her!
Not for long I abandoned ship,
Cast low like the happiness around her hip,
No time like the present,
Sentimentality pause,
I wondered if she fuelled my remorse,
No I’m not dead just close doors open the way,
Since then I looked east with pain,
Called back the animals and spelt unpopular words,
To bring back the things I need,
Please don’t worry.
// posted by me @ 11:52 pm
She’s buried her way to the source [I’m saying ‘hello’ more than ever *introverted mystery smile*] of all my emotions, but she loves triangles more than me!! (HAHAHAA – grass cuts all over but for minus 22 it’s no problem). I can’t wait til she listens she will glow through the clouds and warm the whole place up, blushing asking her what she wants but I’ve seen it happen she says this what she needs, has the kelevala met its match tehehehehehe. Many more rejections to make, tough to keep it up when there’s this demand but like a phone, its a simlar thing. So many ways to communicate!! I saw her vision of snow-like looks in the afternoon I could help her bleed much beauty but the dream box has made a wound {bit like tolkein 🙂 } that will not heal. Mars is closest but there isn’t as much Venus no more. I should’ve listened to jonathan (no richman) the Mercury man. So she’s a lion and her friend’s shocked that I can guess, it would be too much for her to know so I added a bomb #Oh, if only, I knew the language# HA!. So unfinished! Lucifer’s grip is where im walking on the other side of things, one can only hope as six strings go up, a large thump won’t hurt so much. On the Rhino (you know I change) front I saw the tempting Ice Cream van today, but my Cat; ‘mrs polly doyle’ knew that the hu way costs much more than money. Seriously pissed of at this new fella Gary, comes into the sanctury likes he’s all this he think benig a stream winner will let him walk down any hills he likes, he’s in for a surprise, nobody treats Kjartan and Neko like that.. Besides I’ll open the earth in good time there hasn’t been any kind’ve sign of unbroken in the masses to them its still summertime! I suppose yellow calander girl will know HONESTLY DON’T LOOK BACK INTO THE SUN. More acceptance of igorant two-faced, superficialities I’d break if they weren’t my friends. I mean the ego can be used if neccesary but to abuse in ways that she does brings limited scope especially with the infulence of confucism, it is a grim reflection and D has seen it. Supports what I need right now, from other sources to the primary she’s in sorry shockscape ground in the morning. It reminds me of (D)onkey’s precision fooling: He will be singing the humming song if he doesnt start soon, scared of swimming^so I am. There hasn’t been any news from spirit destroyer luckily I silenced him good. That was hypnotic, but recently.. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!! **raised eyebrows** I’m really happy with the results from my lastest robot, I just hope he doesn’t clone one of the founders. Nah, he won’t.. cos… He can’t… Can he? (Good Luck, this is small tease you can leave on the boat to the moon if your trust needs refreshing:- BUY BUY SELL SELL. There you feel better and it is &real&-ly no problem! Understand. Honesty is dwelling in the heart right now and although it’s not the time for floortiles love will reverse this. It’s a bit like the turning tide. 🙂
// posted by me @ 3:39 pm
Friday, July 25, 2003
Today I realised that I have been brought up by two robots [circuit breakdown yeah!] and a pack of super furry animals. Which is a good thing mostly… faulty equipment! Am I a forsbein or what, (haha!). Techno Joy Division lands a loud ‘huh?’ but Bis it’s all in my head.
// posted by me @ 10:28 pm
Saturday, June 28, 2003
Hibernation comes earlier and ealier but I never thought it would be a few days after the summer solstise. Can’t wait for the tiger dotty autumn. I should know (hahaha) all the short form by then and hopefully started doing to some chi gong more often.
// posted by me @ 7:53 pm
Tuesday, May 20, 2003
I woke up this morning and thought I want a cup of tea. So I went downstairs to turn the kettle on and turned the kettle on. I must have waited for 10 minutes or so. The kettle was not boiling. Oh well look what I had done I had just gone and forgot to plug the kettle in.
// posted by me @ 9:53 pm